Wizard is the extremely comprehensive biography of possibly one of the most interesting
men to have ever lived, a man so cool they had to get David Bowie to play him –
Nikola Tesla.
Before we
begin, I should probably make it clear that while I am fascinated by science
and the great thinkers that practice it, my mind does not work in that way at
all (I only passed my Science GCSE after my mum condensed pretty much the
entire syllabus into a series of silly cartoons a few days before my exams) and
so the title of this book is made even more appropriate. My only real
understanding of electricity being that when I flip a switch, my lights come on
(when the bulbs haven't gone), it really may as well be magic as far as I'm
concerned.
So, Nikola Tesla...
Look at him. See? Told you he was cool.
A genius
with a talent for invention as well as for winding up his investors and a
great showman whose incredible lightning spewing demonstrations would capture
the public imagination before his grandiose pronouncements and appetite for
self-publicity saw him later dismissed as something of a crank unable to finish
a project, Tesla would invent many of the things we take for granted in the
modern world whilst also contributing to many more. He would also be eternally screwed
over and in debt, his work credited to and making others rich, his achievements
only properly recognised long after his death.
Born in
Smiljan in 1856 to a gifted family (particularly his mum, who was forever
inventing new household appliances for herself) and possessing a photographic
memory, Tesla was already far more accomplished by the time he'd left University
than most of us could hope to be in a lifetime, having taken courses in
arithmetic and analytical geometry, theoretical and experimental physics,
integral calculus, analytical chemistry, mineralogy, machinery construction,
botany, wave theory, optics, philosophy and higher maths, and speaking 8
languages. He’d also survived several near death experiences including plunging
into boiling milk, drowning under a raft, being swept over waterfall,
contracting cholera, and driving himself through overwork into a nervous
collapse – something he would continue to do throughout his lifetime as he
subsisted on bread and milk, sleeping only a few hours a night and pouring all
of his energies into his work.
Moving to the US in 1884 to work
for Thomas Edison’s company, Tesla would set out on his own after almost
immediately receiving the first of many shaftings at Edison’s hands – being
paid just $18 a day to redesign and reassemble much of the company’s equipment
after having been promised $50,000. These shaftings would also continue
throughout his life, and were as many and varied as his astounding array of
inventions (which included an induction motor, electrical power distribution
system, fluorescent and neon lights, wireless telecommunication, remote
control, robotics and apparently even fricking laser beams) and came at the
hands of not just Edison but the likes of Marconi, Westinghouse, Pupin, Steinmetz,
JP Morgan and the US Government.
Facing a
publicity backlash due to Edison’s dickish publicity campaign in which he
electrocuted animals with Tesla’s competing AC system, mired in patent
infringements and court battles, and forever toadying up to potential investors
(mostly unsuccessfully, thanks to his habit of sending long letters bemoaning
his hard luck and full of emotional blackmail, while asking for way more funds
having abandoned agreed plans in favour of altogether grander schemes), Tesla would
become far more paranoid, bitter and reclusive over time, allowing the weirder
aspects of his personality free reign.
Amongst his many peculiarities
were: an aversion to women's earrings and touching people’s hair, being sent
into fits at the sight of pearls and fevers at the sight of a peach, insisting
on living in hotels despite an almost pathological inability to pay his rent,
where his mirrors must be draped and no sunlight must enter his room. And
despite being a favourite of the ladies (especially of his friend’s wife, Mrs
Katherine Johnson), he remained celibate – having eyes only for his work and,
well, I’ll let him tell you:
“I have been feeding pigeons, thousands of them for years. But there was one, a beautiful bird, pure white with light grey tips on its wings; that one was different. It was a female. I had only to wish and call her and she would come flying to me. I loved that pigeon as a man loves a woman, and she loved me. As long as I had her, my life had purpose."
Tesla
passed away at the age of 86, having outlived his pigeon, sending various
secret agencies into frenzies as they tried to suppress his papers and get
their hands on a rumoured death ray machine, Tesla having supposedly left a
working model in a hotel basement in lieu of rent.
As a reading experience, due to
the staggering amount of information imparted I sometimes struggled with Wizard
- especially as much of it was highly technical information. This, coupled with
the authors insistence on flying off on tangents and flitting around in time,
meant that I often spent entire chunks completely befuddled and bewildered. But
I still learned everything I could possibly want to know about one of the most
interesting people to have ever lived, so I'm not going to hold too much
against it.
And in case you're wondering, I'm firmly on the Tesla side of this rap battle:
iPhone/iPad click here
Too long, didn't read: Drunk History Volume 6 - Nikola Tesla
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