Urban Shaman, by C.E. Murphy

3.5 stars

If I’d read this book at any other time I probably wouldn’t have rated it quite so highly, but Urban Shaman gave me my reading mojo back (I inhaled it in a matter of hours at the start of a day off) and so it gets a thumbs up from me.

When police force mechanic Joanne Walker spots a damsel in distress from her aeroplane seat (yeah, I know, stay with me) she feels compelled to track her down and help. Enlisting the aid of an ageing cabbie on landing, she soon finds herself confronting her Celtic and Native American heritage (and real name of Siobhan Walkingstick) and newly awakened shaman powers (yeah, I know, shut up). Which is handy, as it turns out some Celtic deities have decided that they’re relocating to Seattle.

While the writing wasn’t always spectacular, I liked the sarcasm on display from most of our characters at the situations they were finding themselves in (Gary the elderly cabbie was a particular favourite) as well as the characterisation of the deities, even if I didn’t always enjoy the way some of the magic scenes – with vague metaphors of fixing cars – were handled (these were especially vague to me as I know nothing about cars and have no wish to rectify this). That said, I did appreciate that Joanne’s magic skills were all about healing, rather than the killing skills the heroines of these types of book usually develop, and found it a refreshing change that I hadn’t been aware I’d wanted from this genre.

I won’t be adding the rest of the series to the top of my to-read pile just yet, but they’re definitely in there somewhere, ready for the next time I need some brain candy.

Mammoth Book of Celtic Myths & Legends

by Peter Berresford Ellis, 3 stars

I’ve always loved a bit of mythology but have until now always been drawn to the Greek and the Norse, so it was high time I read a little about the myths that were formed in my own country. Being both mammoth and full of re-tellings of Celtic myths and legends, this one lived up to its title’s promise.

Split into sections covering the different Celtic regions – Ireland, Manx, Scottish, Welsh, Cornish and Brittany – each came with a preface explaining the historical context in which these tales should be placed, something I greatly appreciated. Prompted by the prefaces, it became easier to see how these tales had been shaped and influenced by the landscapes in which these storytellers lived, as well as how they started to change with the influence of Christianity (and the pens of contemporary Christian authorities as they sought to alter or suppress the beliefs native to whatever land they’d ‘converted’).

I enjoyed reintroductions to some of the beings I’ve encountered in modern paranormal stories – such as the Tuatha De Danann and the Fomorrii (thanks to Harry Dresden), early versions of stories I’ve come to know through fairytales (Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty to name two) and, in my own favourite section (the Cornish, being in my part of the world), the Bukkys and piskies that can waylay unwary travellers.

If I had hoped to get a little more on the deities of the Celtic regions, I was to be ever so slightly disappointed, but in all this was a good introduction to a fascinating subject.

 

Dead Witch Walking, by Kim Harrison

1 star

I think I must have been well and truly spoiled by the Jim Butchers and Kelley Armstrongs of the paranormal genre, as Dead Witch Walking is the latest in a long line of paranormal series I've attempted only to find myself rolling my eyes and tutting loudly nearly every time I turned a page.

In a world post-Turn, where the human population found itself hugely diminished thanks to and still quivering with terror at...um...tomatoes, they've now found themselves living side-by-side with a wealth of supernatural races collectively known as Inderlanders. The wildly irritating Rachel Morgan is a witch and runner for Inderland Security, which polices the supernatural community and tags its ne'er-do-wells. Except she's no longer wanted in the I.S. and, backed by her vampire colleague Ivy and tiny pixy partner Jenks, finds herself on the run from their many assassins (standard I.S. termination policy). Trying to buy herself out of her death, Rachel plans to take down and hand over local big-bad Trent Karramack, but as we'll soon find out Rachel's plans have a habit of being completely crap and falling apart quicker than something that falls apart really quickly.

Constantly overestimated by everybody despite the fact that all of her 'plans' end with her getting captured and having to be rescued by others, Rachel is also constantly jumping to incorrect assumptions as well as having some serious trust issues - as in she refuses to trust anybody who proves they can be trusted, preferring instead to trust people she has just met (but only as long as they act reallllllly suspiciously). In case you can't tell, Rachel made my shit itch as badly as if Jenks had pixed me. 

As Dead Witch Walking preferred to focus more on its characters and their relationships than driving forward the story, the fact that I hated pretty much everyone bar Jenks and his family meant that my only real enjoyment came in rooting enthusiastically for Rachel's death. I'll be pretending that that's what happened come the end instead of reading any more of her adventures.

Skin Game, by Jim Butcher

4 stars

Not many series, especially those set in the paranormal realm, manage to get 15 books in without showing signs of bloat, slump, or the author no longer feeling any enthusiasm for their creation (as in the case of the terminal decline of the Sookie Stackhouse books). As tall as he is, Skin Game sees Harry Dresden still standing head and shoulders above his contemporaries as we tear through the latest breakneck instalment in the continued development of my favourite wizard-for-hire.

Following the events of Cold Days Harry has spent a long time recovering on his island with just Mab, Demonreach itself, and the parasite that's soon due to burst from his head to keep him company. But not for long, as Mab has loaned Harry out for a job - a particularly awkward one, seeing as Harry will be working for one of his nemeses, the bastardly Denarian Nicodemus Archleone. Archleone has assembled a motley crew of supernatural types (including a not very friendly Yeti) for the heist of the century - he doesn't want to break into any old vault but one belonging to Hades, down in the Underworld.

Butcher yet again does a great job in raising the stakes for Harry while at the same time avoiding one of the more common missteps in the supernatural; while Harry is no longer just a wizard-for-hire but also a Warden of the White Council and Winter Knight, that doesn't mean that he's now nigh invincible and possessing every power imaginable (*cough* Anita Blake *cough*). Instead each new job has brought a different set of responsibilities, a new set of restrictions, and a new set of challenges (especially in the case of negotiating the moral pitfalls of being the Winter Knight).

Keeping us in touch with the human world are the friends Harry calls in to help - good old Murphy who's always got his back, Michael Carpenter, getting a last hurrah as a Knight of the Cross while also raising Harry's cute-as-a-button daughter Maggie (whose moments, along with Mouse, made it a little hard to swallow past the lump in my throat) and, most effectively, Waldo Butters who proves that you don't have to be the smartest, the strongest, or the most fearless to be a total hero. 

While I may have missed not having Toot, Thomas or Bob (except in a small but great cameo), these were minor niggles easily cancelled out by my glee at Harry's new habit of shouting 'Parkour!' every time he moves (as someone who shouts similar at minor movements like getting off the sofa, I wholeheartedly approve) with my biggest niggle being that I'm now up to date with the series, and am going to have to actually wait for the next to be written. Dagnammit!

Cold Days, by Jim Butcher

3.5 stars

No longer mostly dead thanks to the combined efforts of Mab and Demonreach, Harry's back in the material world in time to save it, again.

Now Mab's Winter Knight thanks to the deal he made back in Changes, his first mission is an ugly one - going after Mab's own daughter. But Maeve's a slippery customer, and may have some compelling reasons up her sleeve (I guess that would be her Wizard's Sleeve, as she spends the book mostly naked)  for Harry to take out Mab instead.

To make things even simpler, he has an awesomely deadly new assistant for his mission (the Cat Sith) who isn't best pleased to be serving him, and most of the Winter Court is out for his blood. Oh, and Demonreach is about to blow, which doesn't bode well for the world considering that the island's purpose is to serve as a demonic Oz - a maximum security prison for the most nightmarish beasties to have ever been unleashed on the world.

Bursting to the seams with action, sometimes I felt there was a little too much this time around, with wave after wave of assault sometimes disorienting me and making me forget just who was after Harry now and why it was important.

I was also a little nonplussed by his friends reactions to his reappearance in their lives. Considering how fucked up we found them all in Ghost Story, and the hoops they made him jump through to prove his really was Harry, I was expecting a bigger reaction than the collective shrug that came from everyone bar Thomas and Mouse.

And finally in my list of niggles, whilst I'm aware that Harry has always been a bit of a dick when it comes to women, I am really not keen on the new, rapey Harry that's been wrought by the mantle of Winter, nor the reactions of the ladies he'd quite like to rape (or the fact that women everywhere are constantly either oozing sex or defined by the lack of sex they ooze). Harry is, in fact, getting dangerously close to me wanting everyone to punch him in the throat.  With the set-up for the next book that came at the book's climax, it's a situation that will probably only get worse as he works out the dynamics of his relationship with the new Winter Lady.

Still, I do love the fantastic flourishes we get whenever dealing with the fae, and with Toot still around and managing to not want to rape everyone he meets, there's still someone at least for me to wholeheartedly throw my support behind. 

But Harry - consider yourself warned...

Side Jobs, by Jim Butcher

3 stars

I've just realised that I've spent a month and a half reading nothing but Dresden. I'm turning into a bookier version of Superhans...

A few short side jobs from the case files of Harry Dresden, taking place from before Storm Front all the way up until after Changes (which you should definitely read first, as Aftermath deals with the, um, aftermath of a pretty huge plot development from that book), this was a fun diversion but didn’t make me feel anything near the brain-shrieking levels of glee that the series has been delivering lately.

My favourites were easily It’s My Birthday Too (as Harry attempts to give Thomas a birthday present, interrupts a game of vampire LARP and has to hit some bad guys with those gravity anvils that I love so much) and Backup (in which Thomas runs around trying to help Harry without him realising, and lets us in on the Oblivion War) although I swear I’m not a Thomas fangirl (my heart belongs to Toot). Our opener, A Restoration of Faith, was also notable in that it showed the germ of what would later come while also demonstrating just how much Butcher has improved over the years.

Not as much of a must-read as the series itself, but a pleasant way to spend a few days if jonesing for a quick fix of Harry. And on that note, it's probably time for a self-imposed intervention before I turn into Gollum.

Changes, by Jim Butcher

5 stars

Holy shit. Those stakes? Just got well and truly raised.

When Harry's ex-lover Susan Rodriguez calls, his world changes overnight. Finding himself in a truly desperate situation, he's forced to make hard choice after hard choice after hard choice...and still the best outcome he can hope for is bleak. I can't say any more than that without dropping a ton of spoilers but trust me, it's a doozy.

While not exactly the most fun entry in the series to date, this probably made it all the more effective for me and besides, just because Harry was having the worst time of his life it didn't mean there weren't moments that nearly made my head explode with glee. Including that cliffhanger, although that also had a dash of...

(and this, even though I'd known something like that might be coming thanks to a couple of hints in Bombshells)

I keep telling myself I'll read something else for a little while. But like any addict, I also keep telling myself, 'just one more...'

Turn Coat, by Jim Butcher

4 stars

I’m continuing my tear through the Dresden Files, and the latest to be devoured was Turn Coat.

As far as Wardens go, Morgan has always been something of a dick. But one capable of murdering a Senior Council member? Harry doesn’t think so, and uncovering the real killer could also help to expose the existence of what Harry’s been calling the Black Council. Trouble is, as far as the people after Morgan go, the Council is the least scary…

While this entry was missing the holy swords and Merlin hints that really tickle my excitement buds, this entry still builds brilliantly upon and hints at a bigger mythology to be discovered (Demonreach!! And Ebenezar’s journal entries. Oh, the possibilities…) as well as starring a particularly dashing appearance by my favourite, Toot.

Ending on something of a bittersweet note, I don’t think I can stop here. While marvelling at the fact that this is the 11th book in the series and that I’m more addicted than ever, I need to get my ass over to the Kindle store and download Changes!

Small Favor, by Jim Butcher

5 stars

I don't seem able to stop reading Harry Dresden lately. Partly because I've managed to accidentally spoil a few upcoming events for myself and want to get up to date so that I'm back in the dark again, but mostly because I'm finding each book more exciting than the last and can't wait to read on.

Small Favor is no exception, as Mab taps Harry for one of the favours he owes her and sends him on the trail of Marcone, recently disappeared by the Denarians (whose last appearance meant all kinds of Hell for Harry). She'd quite like him to be her Winter Knight too, but for now that's an offer that Harry can refuse (although it's sure to soon bite him in the ass). As his luck would have it, as well as going up against some of the worst foes he's encountered yet, Summer wants a piece of him too (though he's not sure why) and have awesomely sent some Gruffs to deal with him. As well as loving the bad-ass Billy-Goats, I get a little shiver of excitement every time we start touching on Harry playing Merlin (not The Merlin, but the Merlin) and so, for me, this instalment was extra shivery. Other things tickling my glee spot this time around were:

• Bob proving to be a book-yeller, just like me.
• Toot. Any time Toot is involved I go to my happy place, but particularly when he's pulling a Full Metal Jacket and letting slip about 'Za-Lord's Guard.
• Murphy's McAnally's showdown. I think I may have a wee girl-crush on Murph, who doesn't need to accept a sword to kick ass.
• Goodness gracious, great fists of Soulfire.
• Wagner, baby.

Most series start well and go downhill from there but that isn't the case with Harry Dresden. I'm trying really, really hard not to immediately go and splurge on the next book, but can already feel my willpower wavering...

White Night, by Jim Butcher

4 stars

Seeing as the last entry was so much fun I decided to hang waiting a while and jump straight in to the next instalment of Harry and his amazing friends.

Another fun, light entry that still manages to raise quite a few stakes, this time around someone is killing low-level magic practitioners in Chicago. Worse still, it's looking as though that person might be Thomas.

With Harry's being a Warden meaning people are now more afraid of him than want his help, and with him relying on Lash (who now even has her own nickname) more and more than he'd ever have allowed before, he barely seems to have noticed the small changes that have taken place in his personality. Others have though...

With only one small misfire (the New Mexico thing, which I initially thought must have meant there was side story that I'd missed that contained all the important information, but which turned out to be waiting for a flashback halfway through the book) the twists and turns are as enjoyable as ever, and I love how Butcher manages to work in other characters that we've met along the way, as in the bullet-flinging alliance with Gentleman Johnny.

I enjoyed it so much, in fact, that I'm more tempted than ever to give up reading anything else for the moment in favour of ploughing through the remaining Harry's instead.

Proven Guilty, by Jim Butcher

4 stars

So, it turns out I only needed to have read one more in the series to meet the protege I was spoiled for in Dangerous Women.  

With the White Council's numbers somewhat thinned thanks to the war with the Red Court, Harry has become a Warden and been tasked to ferret out the casters of the black magic that's been taking place in Chicago. Meanwhile, Michael's teenage daughter, Molly, has found herself mixed up in a situation where movie monsters are manifesting and messing up everyone around them - something that might not be entirely unconnected to the aforementioned black magic.

I'm really enjoying how this world continues to grow and found this instalment to be a particularly fun one that didn't stress me out anywhere near as much as some of the previous entries. That fun was tested for a particular moment in the book...

...but thankfully it's starting to seem that there's way more to some of Harry's companions than meets the eye.

When it comes to his love life, I have to admit that I'm way more invested in whether I'm right in looking forward to Murphy getting the spare holy sword than whether she'll end up snogging Harry, but that's a minor quibble in a series that I'm still eating up with a spoon and wanting more of.

The Iron King, by Julie Kagawa

2 stars

Continuing my splash in the shallow end and still away with the faeries, this time we're in the company of Meghan Chase, a forgettable heroine in a book that is packed with action but that, despite a few notable bright spots, mostly made me feel a bit...

When we first catch up with Meghan she's eagerly awaiting her sixteenth birthday and the getting of her driver's permit. Instead, her little brother gets swapped for a Changeling, sending her on a quest to retrieve him from the Nevernever while confronting a few truths about her parentage on the way. Oh, and falling in love with a fae/fey/whatever prince of the Unseelie Court too.

Despite Meghan's quest, the inclusion of more fey than you could shake a stick it and a couple of nice touches (I loved the bogey's that haunt closets and Grimalkin, a talking cat, was always going to appeal to me) the real focus of the book is on the budding romance between Meghan and her prince, Ash.

Sadly, it's not this Ash:

Instead, Ash the faery prince fails entirely to live up to the awesomeness of his namesake, preferring to be barely discernible amongst the never-ending parade of this genre's love interests who all seem to be the same character, whether they be fey, vampire, werewolf, warlock or whatever. A romance is only ever going to be as strong as the chemistry between our lead and their love interest, and to be honest I didn't find much between Meghan and Ash, and had been far happier when the book was trying for creepy rather than gushy.

That said, the intended audience of teenaged girls (rather than grown women who really ought to know better) may well feel differently.

Wicked Lovely, by Melissa Marr

2.5 stars

Wicked Lovely is neither wicked, nor lovely. It is, however, exactly the sort of simple and undemanding refuge from real life that I need at the moment.

Although usually invisible to mortals, Aislinn has always seen faeries and so has lived her entire life following a few simple rules. The first rule of Faery Club? You do not talk about Faery Club. Sorry, that's not it at all. The rules are these: Don't stare at the faeries, don't talk to the faeries, and don't attract their attention.

But despite a life-time of practicing the first two rules, the faeries are suddenly paying attention anyway. The Summer King has been bound by the Winter Queen, and will only be freed on finding his Summer Queen. Keenan (the Summer King) thinks Ash is special - and not just because she seems to be suffering from some weird disease that means she's unable to sit or stand without leaning against Seth, the mortal boy with whom she's in love (and who's too good to be true - protective without being overbearing, strong yet sensitive, more in tune with her needs than she is and devoted to serving them, and who lives in a converted train car like most teenagers of no apparent means and no visible family do. At least, I think he's a teenager, although thinking about it now he doesn't go to school with Ash and so could just as easily be in his early twenties, in which case what the hell is he doing hanging around with high school girls? The creep).

Unluckily for Ash, once she's been chosen she can't be unchosen. Instead she's left with a choice. Become one of Keenan's Summer Girls, the vapid nymphomaniac fey that warm the beds of Keenan and his Court, or risk lifting the Winter Queen's staff to see if she's really the Summer Queen as Keenan believes (or, as has happened with all of Keenan's past loves, be condemned to carry the Winter Queen's cold instead). Not much of a choice when you'd rather hang out with your human boyfriend instead, eh? But luckily for Ash, it turns out that she's the kind of heroine who can have her cake and eat it too.

Reading this on any other week could have seen me far more bugged by the book's flaws, but for now I'm too busy licking my own wounds and instead found it pleasantly distracting, without ever becoming so engrossing that I'd be tempted to retreat into the book entirely, or posing any real danger of stressing me out (cough, cough, Harry Dresden) or making me emotional (I'm looking at you, Robin Hobb).

That said, I'm also not particularly bothered about continuing with the series.

Bones of Faerie, by Janni Lee Simner

3 stars

I really rather enjoyed this post-apocalyptic take on magic, in a world that's been left devastated by the War between humankind and Faerie. While Faerie hasn't been seen since, it's left it's mark on the world and in Franklin Falls, home to 15 year old Liza, everyone knows that you don't venture out alone after dark, you stay away from the trees, and those that are touched by magic are a danger that can only be dealt with one way.

With Liza's father being her village's leading zealot, when she starts showing signs of magic she has no choice but to flee home and enter the wild and dangerous world.

From being caught by the creepy and tantalising opening, I read this in virtually one sitting, and while it wasn't particularly challenging I enjoyed the world built, and the ways in which it had changed since Before. I loved the idea of all the vicious plants, moaning harvests and hissing shadows, and was also glad to be in the company of a YA heroine who wasn't clumsy, self-obsessed, whiny or stupid.

It was easy to predict certain things and there was nothing particularly mind-blowing about the plot, but I enjoyed sitting back and relaxing into it for a while, and wound up being pretty decently entertained.

Dead Ever After, by Charlaine Harris

1 star

There used to be a time that I couldn’t get enough of the Sookie Stackhouse series. Actioned-packed, a wee bit sexy, and peopled with a crowd of enjoyable characters, it was brain candy of the highest order and each publication day would find me like this:

But it couldn’t last. Fast forward a few years, and my last few outings with Sookie have each been more forgettable than the last, consisting mostly of filler and the lamification of once fantastic characters. Our last instalment, Deadlocked, marked such a low for the series that I’d even managed to completely forget what it had really been about, and had completely blanked on what had become of Claude and the rest of her family. Shows how fascinating it must have been, right?

As such I didn’t approach this one with nearly as much excitement as I should (I’d have been beating down the door of the bookstore on the day it was published in the old days) but somehow, even with my significantly lowered expectations, this managed to disappoint.

In case you’re worried about spoilers, you should probably look away now…..so don’t say you weren’t warned.

*********************************SPOILERS BELOW**********************************

Our first problem was the underwhelming dismissal of the best character in the entire series. While I’d initially started reading for Sookie, I stayed for Eric. And while Harris has tried ever so hard recently to douchebag him up, to the point that he’s now barely the same badass as before, he’s remained one of the biggest and most interesting characters to reside in Bon Temps. I’d already predicted that this book might see him done away with. And while he might not have been killed off (which could have been great, had it been done well), he instead suffers a fate that’s almost worse as he barely makes an appearance before being booted out of the book with barely a shrug. 

Bye Eric - you deserved better.

With a big hole left by such a character, you might have thought Harris had moved him on so she could fit in all the other exciting things she had in store for Sookie. You’d be right – if your idea of exciting consisted of Sookie doing yard work, cleaning the house and cooking up a storm (including pancakes, bacon and tomato sandwiches, country fried steak and home fries. Sorry, no sweet potato pie this time around) while other people tell her what’s been happening off-page in giant information dumps masquerading as conversations. There is a smidge of action – in a couple of scenes that have Sookie nowhere near them – until she finally gets involved right towards the end, where I was long past caring.

Being the last in the series, we do get a small parade of some of the characters that have been and gone, but they’re not really put to much use - Bill gets to flit around the woods and gloat a bit, while Alcide and Quinn do nothing more than sniff a few things and sod off again. Mostly they’re here to remind us of Sookie’s past loves and to remind us of why they each weren’t quite right, so that we can all get into the right space for her final choice.

Talking of which…I’d have been quite happy if Sookie had decided she wanted to be single. I’d have been quite happy if Sookie had met some other guy who gave her the tinglies, and we could see the beginning of the relationship. Instead, I got Sookie settling for the one guy she’s only ever had nothing but friend feelings for and, as he’s avoiding her for most of the book, has barely any interaction with before he “rolled on the condom and plunged in.” Nice. 

I really wish that Charlaine Harris had stopped writing these when she was no longer having fun, and I could keep some nice memories of a series I’d loved. Now I’m just glad it’s finished. 

A Kiss Of Shadows, by Laurell K. Hamilton

1 star

A few years ago I started to read the Anita Blake series, by Laurell K. Hamilton, when wanting a new vamp series to try out. It started out decently enough, with Anita as an ‘animator’ (a necromancer, able to raise the dead) and a P.I. who worked with the cops on any supernatural type cases. Sadly, it soon devolved into a parade of awful outfits, douchebag love interests, over-reliance on plots including threats of and attempted rape, and a grouchy, arrogant and humourless heroine who was desired by all and whose powers inexplicably grew until she was, at the point I stopped reading, not only 'The Executioner' (liaison to the Regional Preternatural Investigation squad, and necromancer) but also the vampire Jean-Claude's human servant (and part of a power triumvirate with he and werewolf Richard), lupa to Richard's wolf pack and leopard lionne/munin/Nimir-Ra (and the kitchen sink) to the wereleopards. With her being easily more powerful than anybody that she came across, soon the actual plots were pushed into the background and the focus became on all that sex instead. It had this effect:

Last year, I thought I'd give Laurell K. Hamilton another chance, that my problems with the Anita Blake series might be confined to that series and Anita herself. I was wrong. Starring Merry Gentry, the half-human sidhe princess, this time around everything that irritated me most about Anita was front and centre; pages and pages of descriptions on the most awful outfits imaginable, the heroine standing around while those around her discuss how beautiful she is, every male she meets lusting after her, and every circumstance dealt with through liberal application of sex, all of which is decidedly unerotic. There's no real effort at characterisation other than Merry being the most beautiful, most fascinating, most wonderful creature to have ever walked the earth - take it as read that every male will want her more than they've ever wanted anyone before, and every woman will see her as a threat. It amuses me to think Hamilton just writes down her fevered daydreams - I'm convinced she's not getting enough.

As for what there is of plot, Merry is in hiding from her sidhe family, and working at a detective agency. Not for long though, as she's summoned back to the Unseelie Court, goes to see the Queen, and is ordered to have sex with loads of men. And that's it. The initial 'mystery' is solved without Merry really even thinking about it, as she instead rubs herself up against anyone who crosses her path, including those with tentacles.

I'm no prude by any stretch of the imagination so my problem with the constant sex was really less to do with being squicky about it and more to do with being insanely bored by it all. I find that the most erotic scenes I've read have usually had some sort of build-up and some investment, emotional or otherwise, is always helpful. Sex is used in this book as almost akin to shaking hands, and it strips it of any eroticism it might have otherwise had. 

There's not much else for me to say other than to try and remind myself not to pick up any more Hamilton in the future, as we really don't get along. In Merry and Anita's worlds, that would mean I was sexually threatened or jealous. Bless.